The Strength and Dignity Flop with a Side of Fear

She is clothed with strength and dignity,

   and she laughs without fear of the future. Proverbs 31:25

I’m not feeling very Proverbs 31 woman-like today. Not when it comes to this verse and how it describes some woman, because there is no way it could be me! Not today. The day has been a normal day without much of anything going on outside of everyday happenings.  There hasn’t been anything bad happen. In fact, all has gone quite well. Except for one thing. Me. I have lost my strength temporarily. I have misplaced my ability to laugh without fear of the future. There is so much in my life that I can fear. And some days, I do. I get tired of being strong and happy and content. I get tired of being positive.

It’s hard to admit this to you, to anyone. But I really want us, specifically women, to understand that sometimes we just feel this way. And it’s okay. It’s okay to temporarily feel “in the mulligrubs” as my dad would say. We just can’t hang out there all the time. This is normal, right? Tell me I’m not alone. Sometimes, I am just down. Period. No particular reason. Just life weighing on me.

So today I read this verse and I cling to it. I cling to the hope that I will be clothed with strength and dignity and laugh without fear of the future as I do on so many other days. Deep down, I trust Him. I trust His plan for my life and the lives of those I love. I get so tired of having to keep giving the fear back to Him, but I keep picking it back up! And as long as I keep picking it back up, I have to continue to keep giving it back to Him.

I would love some encouragement today. I need it. I crave your prayers and your encouragement. I try to be outward and give to others what I truly desire myself. Because I want to be an encourager and I want you to know how much God loves you and is in control of your life, as He is mine. But today, I am wrapped up in myself and need to be freed. I don’t like this place I’m in and need to give it up to God. In fact, writing about it is helping me. Admitting my weakness to you is helping me.

I will let God renew my spirit and I will put on strength and dignity as only He gives. I will not fear the future. In fact, I will laugh without fear of the future. Because I know I am in His hands. I relinquish my need for control because I know the One who knows what is best for me and I am trusting Him. Who is with me?

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